Tuesday, June 14, 2011

New Theme Song, Obviously.

From Equipto and Mike Marshall, feat. Skeptic and Cognito, I present to you:

I Drink Fernet

This is absurd and fantastic and I love every second of it.

That's all for now.

Filed under: Fernet on the Tubes, keeping up with this blog is hard sometimes., Musical Interludes, with love and squalor, Fernet is hella gangsta yo

Monday, February 28, 2011

At Long Last, Your Fernetiquette Returns! (In COMIC Format!!)

Figured I'd dust off the old Bloggin' space to acknowledge this here thing right here:
Awesome cover, no? Oh, and there's also this:
Come celebrate the BRAND NEW “Comic Book Guide to the Mission”! Gather and meet many of the creators of this fabulous and entertaining neighborhood resource. Food! Drinks! Fun!
Featuring the talents of: Sean Chiki (Wunderkammer), Jamaica Dyer (Weird Fishes), Andrew Farago (The Cartoon Art Museum, William Bazillion), Shaenon K. Garrity (Narbonic, Skin Horse), Justin Hall (All Thumbs Press, True Travel Tales, Glamazonia), Mario Hernandez (Love and Rockets, Citizen Rex), Greg Hinkle, Nomi Kane (Chutzpah!), Jonas Madden-Connor (Ochre Ellipse), Paul Madonna (All Over Coffee), Omar Mamoon (The Mission: Taco), Amy Martin(Bachelor Girl, The Single Girls), John Mathis, Aindrila Mukhopadhyay, Roman Muradov (Sad Comics), Jen Oaks, Ariel Schrag (Potential,Likewise, Ariel and Kevin Invade Everything), Matt Stewart (The French Revolution), Alfred Twu (First Cultural Industries), Dan V. (American Objects), Geoff Vasile (Trackrabbit), Jeff Walker, Mike White (Amity Blamity), Clint Woods (Fernetiquette), and Rick Worley (A Waste of Time). Plus, behold this amazing cover by Chuck Whelon (Pewfell)

I have my very own copy, and it's wonderful. The story I submitted turned out great all comic-ified, and I'm just thrilled to have been a part of it. A huge, huge thank you to the lovely and talented Lauren M. Davis for allowing me to participate in such an exciting project. For those of you who live in the area, y'all should come down to the launch party this Friday, March 11 · 7:00pm - 10:00pm at Mission Comics and Art. I'll be there!

Now, we'll see if all this fame inspires me to write a bit more often. We'll see!

Filed Under: Fernetiquette Gets Famouser and Famouser All The Time, keeping up with this blog is hard sometimes., The Comic Book Guide to The Mission, San Francisco in general, Pop's is for winners

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Places You Can Get Fernet: Citizen Wine Bar in Worchester, MA

An emailed tip from Dave from the Bay State:
There is a bar called the Citizen in Worcester MA where Fernet flows freely!  From fernet and cokes to hanky pankys.  Shots chased with Ginger beer and a branca menta flip made with housemade cocoa tincture that is out of this world!  These guys are true kings of the craft and well known as one of the very few places to get fernet in central mass.  Just thought you should know.

Citizen Wine Cheese and Chocolate Bar is the sort of establishment that eschews both conventional bar food AND the Oxford Comma. On the other hand, they do boast "proper ratios" every night. Which is not only impressive, but (depending on how they enforce those ratios) potentially discriminatory. Wooo!

Filed Under: Places you can get Fernet, Boston, Bars should be all forced to post their ratios all the time, welcome to Worchester $1.25 pa, The Oxford Comma is the sexiest comma, Tom Brady is a handsome man,

Monday, June 7, 2010

Places You Can Get Fernet: Halo, in Atlanta, GA.

Fernet was previously found in Atlanta at the local (and not the Murder Kroger).

Again from our traveling correspondent.
At Halo in Atlanta. Stay sexy.

As you can see, my boy is excellent with the Fernet Fotography.
Filed Under: Places you can get Fernet, Fernet Foto File, Atlanta, Fernets and their migratory patterns, Jason Heyward is an effing stud.

Friday, June 4, 2010

The Greatest Fernet Story Ever Told?

Got this in the ol' inbox this week. It was so good, so wonderful, so utterly transcendent that it demanded to be shared, (almost) immediately, unedited and uncut. Without further ado, I present to you, the gentle reader...
 Well. That pic turned out a bit more sacreligious than I'd originally intended.

...The Greatest Fernet Story Ever Told (This Week So Far). Enjoy.
About a year ago I hosted an Argentine wine dinner with 5 courses paired with different Argentine wines. I couldn't find a proper wine to go with dessert so my liquor rep suggested the national drink of Argentina, Fernet Branca. She brought a bottle by to sample and we were both hooked. It really didn't go with the dessert [ED- Shocking!] but I knew it packed verve and would be very memorable to our 80 guests. The dinner went fantastic and I introduced Fernet to everyone, gave a toast and we did our Fernet (sans ginger chaser) together and as you can imagine it was a polarizing experience.  All in all, great night of food, wine and Fernet. 
 So the real story begins post-dinner.  These two girls persuaded me to do shots of Fernet with them. I was feeling Euphoric from the great evening and we ended up doing NINE shots.  I think I forgot to mention that I had to be at the airport at 5:30 am the next morning (or maybe it was this morning) as I was a chaperone on my daughter's 8th grade trip to Washington, DC.....I actually passed out from the indulgence much to my wife's displeasure and had to be carried to the car and poured into bed. [ED- This has never happened to me. Ever.]
I was kinda/sorta unresponsive when my wife and daughter tried to wake me at 3:00 am and after repeated attempts to get me up, they realized it wasn't gonna happen. I woke from my comatose state at 8:00 am and was a little fuzzy but amazingly had no hangover! 
I knew I had to be somewhere and thought everyone had overslept but me. So I got a text from my beautiful daughter Claudia that said "I still love you" and knew I was in trouble. Then I got a phone call from my wife and she didn't still love me!! However, she arranged a flight later that day (for an extra $400 thank-you very much) and arrived at the hotel just as the Redeemer Lutheran School 8th grade class was getting back from the nighttime monument tour. Of course they all knew what happend to me (even the ticket agent at the airport knew!) but I was going to make the best of a bad situation and became the friggin' best 8th grade chaperone anyone has seen. Volunteered for every detail no one wanted and at the end became great friends with the teacher and all the students thought I was the "cool" chaperone. I owe it all to Ferent Branca.
 Let this be a lesson to you, my friends: NOTHING BAD CAN HAPPEN TO YOU when two (or more) girls "persuade" you to do shots of Fernet Branca. It's like Spanish Fly, except instead of helping you get laid, it helps you get awesome. Also, your family will love you forever. The End.

Or not quite the end. Our contributor tacks on with an extra special Places You Can Get Fernet:
I'm the biggest supporter of Fernet in the Panhandle and if you ever get to Pensacola, Florida stop by Seville Quarter for some Fernet at End O' The Alley Bar. We are the leader in NW Florida (not saying much) and are very proud to be in the "know" of this incredible (in moderation) elixir.
Bill Carlson
Seville Quarter
Pensacola, FL
You hear that Pensacolans? (Pensacolians? Pensacolas? Pensacolacicles?) End O' The Alley is your new Home Base. Get to it, people. Oh, and one more note from Mr. Carlson...
ps. The staff has nicknamed Fernet "Kill Bill" in homage to me. You got to be known for something in your lifetime!
  I'll leave the MSPainting up to y'alls.

Amazing. Simply, amazing. Many, many thanks. 

Any other Entries from readers as to your Greatest Fernet Stories? Come on, San Franciscans. I know you've got 'em. Sharing is caring.
Filed Under: MSPaint Skillz, The Greatest Fernet Story Ever Told This Week So Far, Places you can get Fernet, Hangover Freedom, Florida, Yes I know I'm going directly to hell

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Actual Research-Like Substance: Scott Brody's Epic Eva Peron Story

Once in a while Your Fernetiquette pretends to be An Actual Blogger instead of being some schmo who assigns everything a cutsie tag and calls it a day. I admit it's not often, but on occasion I do put legitimate effort into this little webspace.

For example, about five months ago I took the time to type out an ENTIRE EMAIL(!!) that politely asked the purveyors of Bourbon and Branch how they managed to come up with the delicious Fernet-based cocktail known as the Eva Peron. Naturally, I didn't follow up on that email in any way, shape or form. I've been wayyyy too busy to spend my time in the dogged pursuit of truth.

Still my friends, I am here today to testify that you do indeed reap what you sew. Yes, this weekend I received the following note from Mr. Scott Brody, the lead bartender at Epic Roasthouse re: the origins of The Peron:
If you're still interested in the story behind the Eva Peron (and even if you aren't) here it is:

We had a liquor rep trying like hell to get Canton ginger liqueur into Epic back in 2008.  Shortly after bringing it in, we got a call from him to arrange a party for a friend of his.  His friend was going to Argentina on an "epic" adventure and he wanted a specialty cocktail containing Canton for the party.  
 Epic: Pictured
We agreed to try and come up with something, and I took the two ideas: Argentina and Canton, to Tony Nik's in North Beach where I knew Darren Crawford was working.  Our friend and fellow bartender Jake Cornell was there, and the three of us started brainstorming.  I knew that Fernet mixed well with Sweet Vermouth from cocktails such as the Hanky Panky, and everyone in SF knows it pairs well with ginger.  Furthermore, I knew that Fernet is wildly popular in Argentina.  We can't remember exactly who came up with the lime, or who thought of trying ginger ale; but Darren started mixing, decided on equal parts of Carpano Antica, Fernet and Canton, squeezed in half a lime, shook everything and topped it with ginger ale.  We tasted it, decided that ginger beer would work best, and voila, a cocktail is born.  We came up with the name Eva Peron, because the Evita cocktail already exists (nasty thing with Midori in it). 
The drink was a hit at the party, and once Darren started working at Bourbon & Branch, he brought the Eva Peron with him.

If you have any questions, feel free to contact me, or come by Epic and I'll be happy to mix up an Eva for you.

-Scott Brody.
 Odds of me taking Mr. Brody up on that offer? Excellent.

(Srsly tho: Many thanks to Scott for the story!!! Now everyone immediately go to Epic and tip like a Rockefeller.)
Filed Under: Actual research-like substance, Bourbon and Branch, Epic in the non-internet way, Fernet cocktails, The Argentine Menace, San Francisco in general, Don't act like I never do anything for you people